We took a trip to see my in-laws for this past week. I love my husband, but I am not sure how he can be related to his mother. About 17 years ago Fly Guy's mother became a Jehovah's Witness....so I am going to call her The Witness.
The last time we saw The Witness it was August and she and her husband (not Fly Guy's Father...she and Fly Guy's Father have been divorced for about 34 years) came up to see us and the girls. They also brought their grandson. Well to make a long story short there was an altercation between History Girl and the cousin and The Witness...History Girl didn't want the cousin following her into the bathroom and The Witness saw the History Girl closing the door on the cousin and The Witness yelled at History Girl because she felt that it was wrong for History Girl to do that to the cousin....personally I don't think a 6 year old boy needs to be in a women's bathroom with his 10 year old female cousin so I think History Girl was right about having the door close. I ended up yelling at The Witness in the hotel restaurant telling her off for acting that way towards History Girl. So The Witness and her husband left Maine earlier then planned. History Girl has held a grudge against her grandmother since then and feels that The Witness hates her.
Fast forward to this trip. We thought it would be a good thing for History Girl and The Witness to spend some quality time together. The two of them made plans on what they wanted to do together for the last day of our trip so History Girl would feel good about her relationship with her grandmother. Well the two of them were about to head out on their adventure and The Witness said she couldn't been seen with History Girl because she was wearing a skort. Well History Girl wears skorts all Summer and is the main part of her wardrobe. The Witness said that History Girl needed to change because she can't be seen with History Girl. The Witness isn't making herself clear, but she is upset and saying stuff that seemed to be attacking History Girl and not the clothing she was wearing. The Witness asked Fly Guy if he would make History Girl change and he said no since he saw nothing wrong with the clothes she picked to wear and that they were the same clothes she had been wearing all week long. History Girl is very upset now and says she doesn't want to change because she picked this outfit out just to go out with her grandmother. (It was a new shirt and her favorite skort.) Fly Guy, both girls and I ended up getting in the car and leaving.
It turns out that Jehovah's Witnesses do not allow their members to wear skorts because they look like mini skirts, but they can wear skirts and shorts, but a skort that is a combo of a short and skirt is wrong.....HUH? The thing is that Fly Guy and I both think skorts are great for girls because they can play without worry that their underwear will show....so to us a skort is modest, to The Witness a skort is slutty. This could have been handled so many different ways then the way that it was handled. That The Witness could have taken History Girl clothes shopping first thing and they could have picked out an outfit that worked for both of them or The Witness could have been more clear about what was the issue and we would have been willing to work with her to make her feel ok, but The Witness seemed to be attacking History Girl as a person and that made Fly Guy and me upset so that made things really bad. Any how clearly that History Girl's and The Witness' relationship wasn't repaired and was made worse. *sigh* So we aren't sure what we are going to do yet. I am not sure if The Witness really knows why we are upset. We will see how this shakes out.
On top of this the Fly Guy, The Witness' husband and I were talking about Horse Girl learning differences and he said that people make too big a deal out of dyslexia and that it isn't that big of a deal because people grew out of it. ARGH!!!! I am a guest in his house....I wanted to scream and yell and tell him what a fool he is. I instead just ignored it. Maybe I should have dealt with it differently, but I knew I couldn't do it with out being angry. *sigh*
Well I am home safe and it is time for me to curl into my bed and read until I fall asleep since I haven't slept well in days.
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1 comment:
Glad to see you back, but I'm sad to read about your awful trip. Fly Guy needs to intercede between History Girl and The Witness. His mother = his problem. He should calmly explain to her that you both consider skorts modest and that she should have stated her objections to you more clearly so you could work them out. He should also suggest to The Witness exactly what you proposed: that if she objected to the child's clothing, she could have taken HG shopping for a new, mutually acceptable outfit.
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